Gulf County Domestic Violence Taskforce

I Remember When....


I remember when I would curl up in a ball on the floor as the blows were being delivered to protect my unborn child..
I remember when I would hide behind the couch hoping he would go away...
I remember when I wore turtlenecks to hide my bruises..
I remember when his hands were around my throat until I blacked out..
I remember when fear paralyzed me..
I remember when the man at church saw a bruise and when our eyes met he looked away..
I remember when I showed the marks to mom and she said sometimes that happens..
I remember when I called his brother and he said he did not want to get involved..
I remember when I stood with the bottle of pills in my hand thinking it may be the only way out..
I remember the moment I decided it was time for me to make a change..
Author Anonymous


 Insights from a victim of Gulf County
As a child, I watched our neighbors stand silently by as my father beat my mother. No one tried to intervene, let alone call the police. When I got older, my siblings and I would call the police to stop my father from beating my mother. As a child growing up in this type of environment, I thought this was normal for black families, especially since other families were going through the same thing. But, I must admit, our family was the main attractions!
Growing up in a domestic violence situation made me realize that I did not want to raise my children that way. I decided to break the cycle of abuse by teaching my children how to avoid any domestic violence relationships. I taught my son at an early age that he should never use any type of abuse toward a female under any circumstances. My daughter learned that she should never allow anyone to abuse or mistreat her, ever! as a single mother, I instilled morals, respect and honor, into my children so they would grow up to be respectable adults. And I am proud to say they lived up to my expectations.
I also am proud to be a part of the domestic violence movement to help educate, equip and empower woman, and their children, about the warning signs of an abuser. I take great satisfaction in teaching woman how to prepare a safety plan, how to maintain safety and prevent their children from becoming tomorrow's batterers.
It is very important that our children realize that abuse of any nature is unacceptable. They must recognize that just because their parents may have been abusive does not mean they will be abusive too. We can win the war against domestic violence by educating our communities, one family at a time.
That's why as a survivor of domestic violence, I believe it is my mission to make people aware of this deadly predator that is claiming our families in record numbers. we need to have seminars in the schools, churches, community centers, block parties, or where ever a group of people are gathered, so that we can educate people about the different types of domestic violence. There should be a public awareness campaign proclaiming that domestic violence targets everyone regardless of their race, age, gender, educational level, spiritual involvement or financial background. Everyone is at risk, no matter what the circumstances are in their life.
Domestic violence does not always occur between husband and wife. it can be girlfriend-boyfriend, divorced or ex-partners, children against parents, parents against children, siblings against siblings, and people in the same sex relationships. Most people are not aware that domestic violence includes physical, mental, emotional, verbal, sexual and financial abuse. I didn't know either.

Poem Dedicated to Pam Martin who assists the Victims

So alone

No place to go

Who would care?

Who could know?


They only know

The things they see

They’ve no idea

What he’s like to me


No voice, no choice

No worth, no say

No calls, no friends

It’s all his way


There are no fights

There are no blows

Just hurtful words

So nothing shows


It feels like jail

With no way out

Please someone help

I want to shout


Then at last

God answers prayer

There is a hope

Someone does care


She re-assures

And calms the fears

She sees the hurts

And feels the tears


She’s there for you

As she was for me

Don’t hold back

You can be free!